Facing an unplanned pregnancy can raise a slew of different feelings – overwhelming, confusion, fear, uncertainty – to name a few.
You may experience feelings that are completely opposite and conflicting from what your partner feels, which can make the decision-making process more difficult. You are not alone.
Here is a guide to an unexpected pregnancy for partners:
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Breathe
Just breathe. Take a moment, a few hours, a few days, to just breathe, and to reflect on the news of the unexpected pregnancy and the emotions that will come with it. Do what it is that helps you Giving yourself that time to just breathe and to gather your thoughts is crucial when having to make decisions about your future. Always know that there are resources available for you to help you while going through this challenge. You are not alone.
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Reflect on Feelings and Communicate Them
Just like you, your partner is also feeling many various emotions as well. Remember to give each other the time and space that is needed to process and reflect on all that you both are going through. This is important because of how easy it is to fall into the trap of letting your emotions cloud your judgements and can lead to impaired decision making. Once you’ve had time to process everything, find a private space where you and your partner can discuss your options without the opinions of third-party voices. Remember to put everything on the table. Your partner will not know what you are feeling and thinking if you do not voice it out. This will help the both of you get a better understanding of each other’s position in the decision-making process.
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Establish A Perspective
There are two perspectives you can choose to take on. If you choose to dwell on all the negative thoughts that cause anxiety, fear, guilt, worry, and doubt, this can cause your confidence to handle any challenge to diminish, and can cause you to feel less than capable of dealing with the situation at hand. If you choose a positive perspective and decide to step into the challenge and take on your new role, it can help you to discover inner strengths that you did not know you had such as being resilient, confident, an overcomer, and even an effective critical decision-maker. The perspective you choose to deal with a challenge and an unexpected situation, including unexpected pregnancy, will greatly determine the shape of all lives involved, in the near and far off future.
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Seek Support and Guidance
When faced with a big decision, processing your thoughts can be quite overwhelming. Reaching out to someone who you can trust can help to ease mental and physical load. Your support system can be comprised of your mother, father, a sibling, a grandparent, close friends, cousins, a mentor, a coach. Anyone who you could trust to be your confidante, and a constant present help when you need them. You also have us here at Mea Centre. We at the Mea Centre are a team of support workers who are here to be a listening ear, and to provide as much support that you feel is sufficient for you.
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Get Informed
You may or may not know much about pregnancy, or you may not have all the correct and accurate information about dealing with an unexpected pregnancy. Seek out the most accurate and unbiased information that you can find. Take the time to do your research using books, journal articles, various parenting groups, and accessing pregnancy support centres in your area. Research your options for parenting, adoption, or abortion. We at Mea Centre are present to help you get the most accurate information and support that you need. To book an appointment with one of our support workers, click HERE.
By: Chrystel ~ Client Services Director
References:
Fletcher, J. (2002, Dec 9th). What to do if you have an unexpected pregnancy: 7 coping strategies. PsychCentral. https://psychcentral.com/blog/the-psychology-of-dealing-with-an-unplanned-pregnancy
United States Conferences of Catholic Bishops. (n.d). 10 ways to support her when she’s unexpectedly expecting. https://www.usccb.org/committees/pro-life-activities/10-ways-support-her-when-shes-unexpectedly-expecting